


Dreams, flowers, me (and all of you)

by Lollipop_Panda



Category: A3! (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Pre-Canon, Character Study, Dreams, Flowers, Gen, Metaphors
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:26:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28223853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lollipop_Panda/pseuds/Lollipop_Panda
Summary: As someone who enjoys nature and gardening and the peacefulness that the activity brings, it is no surprise that one Tsukioka Tsumugi would dream of gardens. However, as he wakes from this dream, Tsumugi finds he would much rather dream of anything but.“Another one, huh…” Tsumugi whispers to himself as he sits up in bed, staring down at his covers for a moment before he lets his eyes move up and around his room slowly, taking in his apartment.Or, the one where Tsumugi dreams of a garden that slowly grows, and finds more meaning in it than expected.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 14





	Dreams, flowers, me (and all of you)

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Secret Santa here! I hope you enjoy your gift! 
> 
> Happy holidays to you and everyone else reading this! 
> 
> **SPOILERS** (sort of!)  
> (There's a list of flowers in end A/N if you need/want a refresher after the fic)

As someone who enjoys nature and gardening and the peacefulness that the activity brings, it is no surprise that one Tsukioka Tsumugi would dream of gardens. However, as he wakes from this dream, Tsumugi finds he would much rather dream of anything but.

“Another one, huh…” Tsumugi whispers to himself as he sits up in bed, staring down at his covers for a moment before he lets his eyes move up and around his room slowly, taking in his apartment; it’s wrong, and not quite right, and this is the second time this month that Tsumugi has woken from this same dream in a state of nostalgia and loneliness, as if the empty and forlorn garden with the solitary cherry tree has followed him into wakefulness. 

Where his apartment has bright green splashes from the few plants scattered around his single room living space, it suddenly seems dull and lifeless.

Sighing and rubbing his face to shake himself out of it, Tsumugi rises from his bed, prepared to face another day.

Maybe he should get a camellia, to keep himself and his other plants company…

*

Taking a step forward, Tsumugi admires the garden. It’s a familiar sight, and while in the last couple of months it has been abandoned, these past few visits it has seen new additions, and today it has started blooming at last, a welcoming sensation coming with the fresh flowers.

The cherry tree that had once seemed sad and lonely is now shyly growing out its flowers, a small floury of tired looking dandelions still offering encouragement all around it, even the once unsociable gerberas are starting to show themselves, playful and pretty, while the jasmine is loud and fragrant, somehow not overshadowing the moody violets at its feet, the flowers small and heart shaped.

Tsumugi smiles as he takes a deep breath and continues to wander, looking around at the near-barren garden. Something tells him that the rest will soon follow, and it makes his heart swell fondly.

-

Opening his eyes, Tsumugi blinks up at his ceiling, confused for only a moment as he comes back to his senses and rolls over to turn off his alarm. Looking out across his apartment at the narcissus he’s been nursing as of late, next to the camellia he bought on a whim all those weeks ago, Tsumugi smiles, feeling nostalgic and relieved that the once abandoned garden that haunts his dreams is being cared for once more.

Sighing, Tsumugi rises from his bed, prepared to face another day, filled with that strange kind of nostalgia he’s learned to associate with the garden.

*

It’s with no small amount of pride that Tsumugi squats down and smiles at the sunflower that looks to be staring down a beautiful lily like they’re in some unspoken duel, the two standing bold and proud over a sweet little Chinese bellflower, the purple of its flowers looking almost shy, and Tsumugi offers it a kind smile while a dahlia and hibiscus try (and succeed) to invade his senses; Tsumugi isn’t sure if they’re playfully fighting for his attention or they’re just naturally loud.

Behind him, the spring flowers have now fully bloomed, beautiful and fragrant and warm. Tsumugi smiles at the way they all work together, each encouraging and protecting the other, not unlike a family, the cherry blossom offering them all the shade they might need without stunting their growth. 

-

Rolling over and turning off his alarm, Tsumugi smiles as he sits up. His apartment is vibrant and welcoming, but it still feels like something is missing as that now familiar nostalgia only gets stronger.

“Well, it’s fine, at least the garden is lively again,” he says softly to his orchid, the plant stubborn and refusing to do well next to his narcissus. Hopefully if he puts it in the kitchen with the camellia it’ll feel better. Maybe he should get them all some more company.

*

Although he is sort of expecting it by now, Tsumugi is still pleasantly surprised to see that even more flowers have made their way into the garden after all these months. The spring flowers are going strong still, while the sunflower and lily seem to have come to some kind of agreement. The hibiscus and dahlia have quietened too, and appear to have taken a protective stance over the bellflower, the violet brighter, more confident almost, and Tsumugi smiles at it as he touches the cherry blossom in passing, carefully not stepping on any of the other flowers.

Reaching the new additions, Tsumugi keeps a safe distance away, feeling a little intimidated, though he does sit down next to the carnation and joins it in trying to coax the pansy closer to this new group, the flower seeming so much smaller than all its counterparts, leaves shivering and flowers drooping. Tsumugi’s heart squeezes in sympathy for it and he politely looks away, hoping the little flower will soon feel welcome as he finally looks to the cosmos and spider lily that are fighting for room while the chrysanthemum between them sags, appearing unimpressed with the whole situation.

It’s quite a mess, and it makes Tsumugi chuckle fondly, even as he looks at the distance separating them all.

-

There’s no alarm to wake him this morning, only the autumn sunlight shining into his eyes, and Tsumugi groans quietly as he moves out of the way of it, sitting up slowly.

Thinking back to the spring and summer flowers of his dream-garden, Tsumugi knows that even with how wild and messy the newest additions are, they’ll all be fine.

“Do you think I could care for a rose?” he asks his newest addition; a droopy little anemone, “I’ve heard they can be quite eccentric…” he muses, looking around his one-room apartment and wondering what place would be best for such a flower.

*

Leaning down and smiling at the pansy now settled in the center of the autumn flowers, the spider lily and cosmos looming over it protectively while the carnation stands tall by its side, effectively dwarfing the small flower, even the chrysanthemum looks less fed up with the world, proud almost as it faces the group of flowers, Tsumugi carefully ( _very_ carefully: he wouldn’t put it past these flowers to bite him) strokes the pansy.

“I’m glad you’ve found your place,” he tells it honestly, amusement invading him as the spider lily and cosmos bristle and straighten in what he can only assume is pride.

Feeling fond and warm, Tsumugi stands and looks up, freezing in place at what he sees.

There, staring right at him, is himself. It’s not quite himself though; this Tsumugi’s skin isn’t quite as pale, his eyes are bright and lively instead of unsure and lost, and Tsumugi doesn’t know if he’s supposed to be looking into a mirror or not, but the sight is chilling, reminded of what he once was.

“It’s your turn now,” he hears in his own voice. It echoes around him, as if the garden is a closed space conductive to carrying sound instead of wide open and thriving with beautiful flowers.

“Wha…what do you mean?” Tsumugi asks his dream-self, voice strangled, gripped by something that feels like desperation, as if he’s reaching out to something he wants, _needs_ , but isn’t sure if there will be anything there when he closes his fingers.

The only answer he gets from himself is a fond shake of the head and a raised arm, hand gesturing gently in the direction of the blooming flowers, all keeping each other company and completing each other in a way Tsumugi misses but doesn’t know why.

“Find yourself again.”

It’s the last thing Tsumugi hears before waking suddenly, eyes snapping open and staring across his room at his library, full to the brim with books; some old school books and literary classics, but mostly scripts and plays from a time of passion he’s never been able to let go of.

Closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, Tsumugi hopes he’s not misunderstanding what his dream-self was telling him and almost falls out of bed in his hurry to go book a train ticket.

*

Tsumugi’s mind is made up: he’s going to take up acting again. He can’t stay away any more, he just doesn’t have the strength, not when he has so much passion left in him, and even though he loves each and every one of his plants, he knows that pouring all of this passion into them won’t be enough, that there’s going to come a time where he won’t have room any more. The sense of nostalgia he always seems to wake with whenever he dreams of that ever-blooming garden has factored into his decision too (seeing his dream-self in said garden a week ago definitely helped).

Seeing Tasuku the moment he steps foot out of the station isn’t quite unexpected - of course Tasuku is here, he got into the God Troupe - and every part of Tsumugi’s fragilized heart yearns to speak with his childhood friend once more, to maybe even share the stage with him like they used to.

However, one of many things that is unexpected is seeing Tasuku join the newly reformed Winter Troupe (Tsumugi had had a thought for his dream-garden at discovering the troupe names and had smiled to himself, and then promptly told Azuma it was nothing when the man had asked).

Between being made leader even with his insecurities, getting caught in a time loop and making up with Tasuku, the decision to continue forward and accept the God Troupe’s challenge, all of this leads to Tsumugi needing a place of respite. One he finds in the Mankai Company’s garden.

As he sits on the bench, taking in the tranquil atmosphere, Tsumugi’s mind wanders, returns to that beautiful ever-blooming garden that has lived in his dreams for so many months now. Somehow, he knows it’s not just in his dreams any more; he sees it in Sakuya, the young man upbeat and strong, the first one to join the company and do his best to bloom inside it, in Tenma and his unwavering yet deceptively tender heart, in Banri and his desire to be the best all while bettering himself for it.

Tsumugi thinks of the cherry tree, of it’s once lonely figure, of the now bright blossoms and all the others that surround it and support each other mutually, of the sunflower and cosmos. Of that shy little Chinese bellflower and the pansy that found a place to belong. Remembers how after many weeks the flowers all came together in harmony, finding strength in each other, and Tsumugi understands now why his dream-garden has yet to see any winter flowers.

A serene smile finds its way to his features as Tsumugi recalls his dream-self telling him it was his turn.

Calmer and more determined than ever, Tsumugi stands and returns to his and Tasuku’s room, swearing to himself that he’ll do his best to provide the audience with the best show he and the rest of his new troupe mates possibly can.

There will be a winter garden, he’ll make sure of it, both inside his dreams and here, in the Mankai Company. He is quite certain the others will help, pour a little bit of themselves into nurturing the plants so that they can all bloom as one.

*  
(omake)

“Another one? Tsumugi you need to stop bringing new plants in, we’re running out of room in here…” Tasuku sighs as Tsumugi steps through the threshold of their room, pot in hand.

“Just this one, it’s important Tasuku,” Tsumugi tells him, walking with purpose towards his shelving unit, looking for the best place to put his newest addition.

“All your plants are important…” Tasuku grumbles quietly, though the upturn of his lips betrays him, taking a step closer to examine Tsumugi’s latest frenzy, “Fine, I’ll bite. What’s so important about this one? Isn’t it just a weed?”

Tsumugi doesn’t answer immediately, instead making the most of Tasuku being next to him to hand him the pot so he can move a couple of his beloved plants, movements careful and gentle. Then, finally, as he takes the pot back from Tasuku’s hands and puts it down in the space he’s just created for it, between his narcissus and perpetually flowering orchid, the anemone and camellia close together on the shelf above while his small but no-less vibrant rose immediately makes itself comfortable just below, he answers.

“Lets just call it intuition…” he murmurs, fondly stroking the buttercup's leaves, looking forward to when he’ll get to see its first flowers. 

“You’re telling me you saw it in a dream,” Tasuku deadpans, crossing his arms, eyes sparkling with mirth even as his body language says he’s not impressed, and Tsumugi smiles brightly at him, opening his mouth to answer-

“Humu? Now what’s this I hear about dreams? Tsumugi-kun have you perhaps been spending too much time with Hisoka-kun? Or maybe inspiration has struck and we will be witness to our dearest leader’s poetic prowess!?” Homare asks, barging into the room in a flourish, cutting off whatever Tsumugi had planned to say and making him laugh quietly instead, preparing to answer the man before he’s interrupted yet again.

“You’re so loud Arisu,” Hisoka murmurs as he shuffles in behind the man, offering one of his small smiles to Tsumugi, “But if it’s Tsumugi, I don’t mind listening to a poem. Or sleeping. Both are nice...”

“They’re even better with marshmallows and good company, aren’t they?” Azuma asks with a smile as he steps into the room to join the rest of their troupe.

“Why are you all here all of a sudden!?” Tasuku demands, expression growing more and more confused as Homare launches into an explanation, the details vague and poetic while Hisoka makes himself comfortable and Azuma watches them fondly.

Tsumugi chuckles quietly and looks at his buttercup once more.

“Don’t worry, we’ll make sure you feel welcome.”

**Author's Note:**

> Here's a list of everyone's flowers, just in case (sorry it makes A/N so long):
> 
> Sakuya: Cherry blossom  
> Masumi: Violet  
> Tsuzuru: Dandelion  
> Itaru: Gerbera  
> Citron: Jasmine
> 
> Tenma: Sunflower  
> Yuki: Lily  
> Muku: Chinese bellflower  
> Misumi: Dahlia  
> Kazunari: Hibiscus
> 
> Banri: Cosmos  
> Juza: Red spider lily  
> Taichi: Pansy  
> Omi: Carnation  
> Sakyo: Chrysanthemum
> 
> Tsumugi: Narcissus  
> Tasuku: Orchid  
> Azuma: Camellia  
> Hisoka: Anemone  
> Homare: Rose  
> (Guy: Buttercup)


End file.
